Keepin' It Happy

We talk often about loving God and loving our neighbor. Today let’s talk about a specific neighbor — your husband. If you have one, loving him is a priority given to you. If you do not have one, you love your neighbors by encouraging those who are married to love their husbands well.

This love is shown in so many ways, every day, but today I’ll address one aspect only: love him by expressing how special he is to you.

Make a special time together. Remember how exciting it was to go on a date back when your lives weren’t completely entwined? You can’t go back, but you can still keep the spirit of that excitement alive in other ways. Even if family schedules are busy, you can make time for a shared interest weekly or monthly, or you can take 5-10 minutes to share undivided attention each day. Maybe a date night is part of your routine. Don’t let those just become a frantic trips to Sam’s Club with drive-thru on the way home. A little bit of lipstick and clean clothes goes a long way. Showing by your demeanor that the time is special, dedicated to your marriage, is important. We often need the concrete signals for both ourselves and the ones we are honoring.

Play with each other. In a good marriage, there’s no one else in the world with whom you can be quite as relaxed. Keep that fresh. Some times that may take effort, but it will be worth it. Take a deep breath, shake off the tension of the day, smile and then laugh! Laughter is good medicine, for your heart and your marriage. When the giggling and goofing off comes easily, treasure it.

I’ll admit, I was surprised at the bond that was created after our wedding by the times of joking or laughing with my husband. It is a benefit that can easily fall to the wayside in times of stress or too much routine, but don’t let it get left behind. The strength of your bond will help you through hard times, but it needs refreshing as you go.

Suffering from Isolation

“On a very practical level, human beings just fundamentally have a better chance of surviving in social and familial groups than in isolation,” says a Forbes article.

Most of us would not argue the basic sense in that statement. But how well is that reflected in our daily lives?

Surgeon General Murthy, referencing his practice in Boston, said that the most common illness he saw “was not heart disease or diabetes, but it was isolation. It was social disconnection.”

There are multiple factors in our culture’s increasing trend toward isolation, and it is so easy to drift that way without realizing it. How often do we catch ourselves absorbed in our phones in a group of friends? How many days are full of tasks and productivity without any meaningful interaction with all the people we saw, sometimes even our family members? How many good friends do you have, who know your daily life — good, bad, and ugly?

One beauty in loving our neighbors is that it is so good for us AND our neighbor. We need each other. Not just the help with a flat tire, but we also need the relationship. Conversations on the front porch, a daily phone call to an elderly family member or friend, and shared meals all improve our physical and emotional well-being, as well as our spiritual fitness.

God’s wisdom is amazing! Love your neighbor today.